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Word Brothel has 407 articles published.


5th Grader Breaks Up With Tinder Girlfriend He Never Met Through Text

12/12/2016 By: Ben Gauwitz A central Illinois 5th grader has just broken up with a girl he never met this week on social media. Word Brothel reporters were able to catch up with Jerid Daring in his hometown of Chillicothe, IL to see what caused this irrational decision. Daring has been the focus of a lot of attention in his small town after dating the hottest girl in his class, as well as the class above him in a span of just one month. When asked if he will also pursue the hottest girl in the grade below him, Mr. Daring… Keep Reading


These Photos of Mike Pence Reimagined as Different Types of Gay Men Are Stunning

VP-elect Mike Pence is well known in the LGBT community and not for great reasons. Here are some beautiful renderings of what Pence might look like as different types of gay men and we think they are fabulous. Bear Pence: The carpet doesn’t match the drapes on this muscular love machine! Jock Pence: This bad boy looks like he’s ready to whip America into shape over the next four years. Show Queen Pence: Politics can be a drag sometimes, but never before like this. Gorgeous! Chub Pence: More cushion for the pushin on this Mike, but he needs to work… Keep Reading


VP-elect Mike Pence’s Review of “Hamilton”

Word Brothel Theater Review Exclusive By: Mike Pence 11/19/2016 To say that my breath was taken away would be the understatement of the century. Hamilton was a brilliant retelling of an important time in our nation’s history, but told through a modern style with a diverse cast. In the current political climate it is more important than ever for these voices to be heard and I truly felt like I was experiencing something monumental. I’ve long been a fan of Broadway and musicals. I rank this right up there with Rent, The Color Purple, and anything written by Stephen Sondheim.… Keep Reading


10 Engagement Photos That Look Like Expressionist Paintings

By: Jason Elewski 11/19/2016 Everyone can agree that engagement photos are one of the most beloved visual art forms of the modern era. Whether they’re shot in the town park, the town park’s gazebo, or even the old railroad tracks near the town park, we can’t help but indulge in the love that couples share on our Facebook feeds. Though every engagement photo is objectively beautiful, some are so stunning that we almost can’t believe a famous painter didn’t create them.     They wanted to appear as if they spent a lot of time lying on the grass. It… Keep Reading


Are Pacifiers Leading Infants Down a Dangerous Path?

  By: Maximilian Stolte 11/17/2016 Pacifiers provide a sense of comfort for infants and appeal to their instinct to suck, but what are the ramifications? Many parents use them to sooth their crying babies and help them go to sleep, but what mothers are finding is that they are causing more and more babies to fall into a dangerous lifestyle: rave culture. This has led to what some are calling the infant ecstasy epidemic of 2016. Amy Osbourne, mother of two from Austin, Texas, is creating a movement of mothers against pacifiers in order to quell this outbreak of infantile… Keep Reading


A Voice of Rationality! Creator of ‘Barack O’Hitler’ Meme Calls for Peaceful Transfer of Power

11/12/2016 The nation has fallen into turmoil following the results of the US general election on November 8. In trying times like these, social media almost always finds a source of optimism to lighten our collective mood. Last month, we found solace in the amiable crimson sweater of Kenneth Bone. Today, a new hero was born. At 4:19am, Craig Douglas took to Facebook in a plea for the peaceful transference of power. Douglas, a bank teller by day, is known best for his creation of the widely disseminated image depicting Barack Obama as some sort of Hitler-Demon. In his plea,… Keep Reading


8 Things To Be Happy About In These Trying Times

11/10/2016 The 2016 Election has caused upheaval and unrest across the 50 states as President elect Donald Trump prepares to take the most important position in our country and possibly the world. It may be hard for some to accept the fact that this controversial figure will be responsible for making policies that affect our everyday lives. We here at Word Brothel would like to offer a small beacon of hope with some things to be happy about during these most trying times. 8. Eggs Eggs are an excellent source of protein, they give us the strength we need to… Keep Reading


7 Tattoos That People Immediately Regretted

We all make mistakes in our teenage years and well into our twenties, but usually those mistakes don’t last forever. Well when you decide to immortalize those mistakes through ink on your skin, they can last a lifetime. Here’s a list of people who definitely regret their decisions. 7. Foot tattoos can be cute and fun. They’re easy to cover up for jobs, which this person can’t seem to hold on to. Maybe it’s all the unlistenably shitty dubstep she likes to play in the kitchen or her inability to keep from blowing half the staff at every restaurant that… Keep Reading


Widespread Panic Tour Sponsored By Viagra: Response To Whiskey/Coke Dick Epidemic

Jun. 2, 2016 For the past 30 years, Southern rock jam band Widespread Panic has toured the country and played sold out shows to fans ranging from drug induced hippies to whiskey fueled rednecks. In the wake of their shows they leave good times, memories, and a trail of drug and alcohol related erectile dysfunction the likes of which the jam band scene has yet to see. Armed with this knowledge, Pfizer has decided to sponsor the band’s upcoming tour and will be passing out Viagra samples outside of every show in every city. The drugs of choice for Spreadnecks… Keep Reading


10 Zoo Animals That Should Have Been Shot Instead Of Cincinnati Gorilla

May 31, 2016 The internet has been rushed with opinion about the fatal shooting of Harambe the silverback gorilla of the Cincinnati Zoo. Whether you believe that the gorilla was a benign caretaker for an otherwise neglected child or that the insane murder monkey was put down justly, we can all agree that these animals should definitely have been shot instead.     10. Anaconda Clearly an anaconda would have been a better death. First of all, they’re spooky and slimy, which is totally gross. Besides that, they can eat people and even animals bigger than themselves. That’s impressive and… Keep Reading

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