Austin Powers in Goldmember is a Christmas Movie and Nothing You Say Can Disprove This Fact

Austin Powers in Goldmember is a Christmas Movie and Nothing You Say Can Disprove This Fact


By: Maximilian Stolte

Each and every holiday season families the whole world round get together. We eat, drink, give presents, and most importantly watch classic Christmas movies. A Christmas Story, Elf, Home Alone, and The Grinch all come to mind when one thinks about holiday related cinema, but there’s one that is commonly overlooked: Austin Powers in Goldmember.

I know what you’re going to say, so spare me. Just because a movie doesn’t center around holiday related activities does not mean it isn’t a Christmas movie. Let’s look at some of the facts in favor of my claim.

In the third movie of the classic trilogy we see Dr. Evil and the titular Austin Powers set aside their differences and discover the importance of family over all else. If that doesn’t just scream Christmas, then what in the hell does? You Scrooge!

“Silver and gold, silver and gold”. Remember that song? It was from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. That song established those two precious metals as Christmas canon and this movie is chock-full of the latter of them: gold baby, yeah!

Take a look at this guy. He’s definitely had too much food this holiday season. I think we can all relate. Just like most of us, he is going to make a New Year’s resolution to lose some weight and then give up come February.

Finally, at no point in the movie does it specifically say what time of year it is. An observant viewer of this movie would also note that at no point do they say it ISN’T Christmas. Therefore I conclude that most of this movie takes place on Christmas day. Is that enough proof for you asshole?

This Christmas I urge you and your family to gather around the television and turn on this cult classic Christmas flick. That’s an idea that’s worth…1 billion dollars! Muahahaha!

Word Brothel