3/16/2017
By: Maximilian Stolte
Wowza, this account was created 2 hours ago and has not one, but two bikini pics featured as profile pictures! Her only post so far is that she’s new in town and doesn’t have many friends, score! Only one problem, you’ve been down this road before. Chances are she’s just a fake account and doesn’t really value your potential friendship. Better peep the mutual friends to make sure this account checks out.
Would ya look at that? 5 mutual friends! Oh boy, this could be the real deal. Wait a minute, these guys all look familiar. They’re the dudes you haven’t talked to since high school that only share pictures of trucks and scantily dressed buxom women, with the occasional scantily dressed buxom woman next to a truck. There’s no way they ALL fell for the same trick. Right?
Robert Dunbar never was the brightest kid and he certainly didn’t fair well with the ladies then, but that doesn’t mean he’s so desperate for female companionship that he’d accept a friend request from any promising lead to get laid. He probably knows her from a local bar or something.
Alan Childers, now there’s a guy with integrity. Surely if he accepted her friend request, he knew her personally. I mean, he’s the one who brought his mom to junior prom. He obviously keeps his circle small, so add one to the real profile tally.