By: Graham Reinbold
Hey Word Brothel! My name is Richard Sampson, and I’m constantly traveling for work. I’ve had the same problem every time my flight makes an unexpected landing. I can’t figure out if flight attendants are flirting with me, or just trying to get me to open the emergency exit? During my last trip to Dallas for example, all the signs were there. This flight attendant was showering me with attention, and couldn’t keep her eyes off me! I felt like the most important man in her world, but something was off. I just couldn’t figure out If she liked me for me, or just wanted to pry open the emergency exit I was next to? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
Great question Richard, we hope this guide will help!
Are the sparks flying between you and her, or out of a faulty engine?
We’ve all dreamed of meeting that special someone. A candlelit dinner before a romantic six mile walk down the beach. The evening would end with a kiss and the feeling of your lips locking would taste like microwaved fireworks. However, if the only sparks you’re feeling are visibly shooting out of the plane turbine, it’s probably more of a faulty engine situation than true love.
Is she trying to cuddle, or assist you with your oxygen mask after safely securing her own?
Most people like cuddling in pajamas, sweatpants, or an old college hoodie. So if she comes at you with an oxygen mask, you can probably assume she’s not trying to fall asleep on your chest watching The Office. Note: The bag won’t necessarily be filled, but it’s still working. A lot like your heart.
Is she trying to cop a feel, or trying to use your seat as a flotation device in the event of a water landing?
Does she seem overly interested in what you’re sitting on? You may be tempted to think it’s the sight of your man ass spilling out the brim of those chinos, but hold your horses! How do you know she’s not just interested in that sweet, sweet floatation device that your seat can double as? If the cabin is rapidly filling with water and you’re able to see fish from your middle seat, this is a strong sign you’re apart of a water landing.
Attraction is a complicated issue, but two things are for sure! You should always air on the side of respect, and not assume a friendly worker is flirting. Even more importantly though, if you’re not up to the task, please don’t sit by the emergency exit. Hope this helps Richard, safe travels!