By: Maximilian Stolte
Walking the streets at night in the city can be dangerous. You want to always make sure that you are aware of your surroundings because criminals are waiting for the opportune moment to make you their victim. At the same time, it’s pretty hard not to rock out to your favorite jams while you’re walking to and from the train or bus. Since you know you’re going to pop your headphones in against your better judgement, here is a list of the top 5 songs to listen to while you’re getting mugged.
5. “In The Air Tonight” -Phil Collins
You can certainly rock out to this banger while you’re being held at gunpoint and yelled at to empty the contents of your pockets and bags. When the drums come in and really set the song off, you’ll get even more of a rush of adrenaline than when you first noticed your attacker with weapon drawn. Plus, Phil Collins is always a good choice.
4. “Another Day In Paradise” -Phil Collins
This one will really hit home. The social commentary will really give you a peek into the broken class system and economy in America that leads people to have no choice but to rob you. It’ll be a gentle reminder that in some way, you’re responsible for what’s happening to you right now. Well, besides being oblivious to your surroundings in a crime-ridden city.
3. “Take Me Home” -Phil Collins
You won’t mind getting robbed to this Collins banger. Look, nobody likes to get all of their possessions forcefully taken from them, but we can all agree that some Phil Collins will make the experience at least a little more enjoyable.
2. “You’ll Be In My Heart” -Phil Collins
This song is so heartwarming it can bring a tear of joy to your eye even when you want to cry tears of fear. The uplifting and nostalgic feeling of this song will bring any 90’s kid to a place of warmth and consolation that will make the traumatic experience of almost dying over $30 cash and some overdraft debit cards more bearable. I mean, TARZAN!
- “Easy Lover” -Phil Collins and Philip Bailey
If this jam doesn’t have you going from trembling in your boots to tapping your fucking toes then I don’t know what will. You’ll be grooving all the way until your headphones are ripped from your ears and your iPhone is stolen from your grasp. While you wait for a passerby to call the paramedics, the lingering melody of this song will totally make you forget all about your stab wound.