Obama Already Asking Biden If He Can Play With His Drones
By: Nick Coffman
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Within minutes of his election victory, President-elect Joe Biden had already received numerous phone calls, texts, and DMs from President Barack Obama, requesting drone access. Biden was not surprised by the former president’s haste. “Barry always loved playing with those drones,” said Biden, who in his eight years as Vice President, was only allowed to pilot the drones once after begging for access on his sixty-eighth birthday. Obama recalls the day he gave Biden the drone controls. “I told Joe, ‘You can zoom this across the rose garden, just don’t hurt anyone.’ Now the shoe is on the other foot and he’s leaving me on read,” said Obama.
Biden said he plans to share the drone with Obama and senior members of his cabinet. Turns will be decided by paper airplane races, resulting in the person with the farthest plane getting the first stab at flying the daily middle-east errand run. “I’m not a hog. I just want to make sure everyone gets a fair amount of drone time,” said Biden. At press time, Vice President-elect, Kamala Harris was hard at work picking out members to serve on the cabinet’s Boom Boom Drone Committee.