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sexual harassment


Fearless Council Of Male Comedians Forgive Louis C.K.

By: Allie Rubin A group of brave, handsome male comedians convened a press conference following Louis C.K.’s surprise stand-up set at the Comedy Cellar on Monday to announce that they had finally deemed the comedian, 50, worthy of their forgiveness. “Too long has the world been deprived of Louis C.K.’s unique voice,” announced Josh Robertson, 28, who performs on the all-male Chicago indie improv team ‘Prostitots.’ “We believe that Louis’s nine months spent traveling in Europe have been adequate punishment for his minor indiscretions. We have carefully considered the situation and are thrilled to announce, on behalf of all male… … Keep Reading

Justice At Last: The Weinstein Company Is Changing All Of Harvey Weinstein’s Producing Credits To ‘Farty McMasturbator’

By: Jason Elewski Just as the they are about to file for bankruptcy and free anyone bound by a non-disclosure agreement regarding their once virile founder, Harvey Weinstein, the Weinstein Company is taking one more act of penance to correct years of wrong-doing. After unwittingly ruining the lives and careers of any woman whose vocabulary included the word “no”, the Weinstein Company has decided to clear the slate of their tainted history and replace all of Harvey Weinstein’s producing credits with the name Farty McMasturbator, simultaneously shaming Mr. Weinstein and allowing viewers to watch their favorite flicks, unimpeded by the… … Keep Reading

New Streaming Service Exclusively Features Blacklisted Hollywood Predators

By: Madeleine Russell Chicago, IL – Netflix has top billing in the world of content streaming services, but a new competitor is about to debut. Amazon, who has already seen tremendous success with their streaming service through Prime, will be utilizing dozens of blacklisted hollywood sexual predators with it’s new streaming platform, Amazon Crime. After this year’s thundering #timesup presence at the Golden Globes, a growing number of entertainment perverts have found themselves with no voice, career, or power with which to wield over women’s bodies. This cesspool of unused, disgusting, shameful garbage is ripe with potential, according to Amazon… … Keep Reading

Donald Trump

Trump Pardons Whitest Turkey With Longest List Of Sexual Harassment Allegations And Civil Rights Violations

By: Maximilian Stolte Just as each president before him did, Donald Trump continued the tradition of granting a pardon to one turkey for this Thanksgiving holiday. In keeping with Donald Trump’s new pardoning tradition, the turkey pardoned was none other than George Wallace III. Beyond being the whitest turkey the president could find, this turkey also has a troubling past.   Recent allegations against this turkey for sexual harassment and assault number in the twenties. Many of the female turkeys either wished to remain anonymous or were murdered for Thanksgiving dinner (and to quiet them). “He was always commenting on… … Keep Reading

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