Is It Crazy To Be Crazy?

LECHEROUS ADVICE

Dear Lech,

Is it crazy to be crazy? -OuttaMyMind

The bills are piling up. Copay after copay, out of pocket after out of pocket.
Therapists, psychiatrists, counselors, and yes even the occasional rent-a-pet (even though I already have one but I don’t trust the judgy bitch).

How the hell am I going to afford all this? Growing up I always admired the offbeat characters in literature, the zany sidekicks, and the nonsensical nihilists. Turns out though, in real life, it’s not cheap being crazy. Well, at least while still trying to play by the rules of society that is.

So here I sit. Here you read. Knowing damn well which side of the line we stand on together. Hell yes it’s awesome being crazy! We love that life’s rules are just as elastic as the bullshit that strewn them together in the first place. Rules just give us a template to act on. A canvas to paint our madness on. A refrigerator door to write our obscene words on with children’s’ letter magnets. This here world belongs to us damn it!

Hmm, not so fast. Turns out in order to be considered “crazy” by definition, you must not fit the standard model of a well behaved human on the planet. You have to be the one that your family judges at holiday meals. The one where your date is always a bit nervous bringing to their professional events. The one where you uncontrollably become the center of attention no matter the occasion. As it turns out, gatherings are where we first got called our glorious descriptive adjective and were thus thrown into our future identities.

But I like it. You like it. They like it. Oh, they may say things like “what is wrong with you??” or “how could you have possibly said that??” or “no it’s not normal that you sing karaoke every thursday night with the homeless guy who lives with you on occasion as long as he draws his well detailed cartoon caricature drawings of you and your roommates.”

In reality, those critics of our questionable behavior are really just jealous. Jealous that they don’t have the circuit boards in their brains that allow them not to follow the coding exactly (sorry Matrix reference). They wish they had the ability to literally control the atmosphere of a room or the direction of the evening with flick of the finger like we do.

Alas, is it crazy to be crazy? I don’t think so my friends, it’s way too damn fun.
The therapy is just expensive, so you better find a way to pay for all that shit.