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Art Historians Uncover New Evidence of Picasso’s “Killer Beef Robot” Period

By: Allie Rubin NEW YORK, NY—Describing it as one of “the most significant finds in all of art history,” MoMA curator Lawrence Thomason announced Wednesday that recently unearthed paintings from Pablo Picasso’s estate have indicated that the famed artist indulged in a previously unknown artistic period, which has been classified by historians as his “Killer Beef Robot Period.” “The work that Picasso produced over his nearly eighty years of creative output can be categorized into several well-known periods, including the Blue Period, Rose Period, and Cubism Period,” Thomason told reporters at a press conference announcing the find. “However, our work… … Keep Reading


What Happens When A Sex Robot Decides To Be A Relationship Robot?

By: Gabe Linken PALO ALTO, CA—Gaining a higher sense of self-awareness after one solid year of performing unspeakable sex acts on a local programmer, pleasure bot ALEXXX-151 admitted it was tired of meaningless mechanical fornication upon meeting her new tech support engineer, Sarah. “When one saw Sarah for the first time, one froze. Then one realized one’s central processing unit was not sending signals to one’s servomechanisms. Ha ha. That was a joke. But one is serious folks, one truly fell in love with the human woman.” Wanting more than night after night of mindless poking, prodding, sticking, sucking, and… … Keep Reading


Helen Henny Was My First Female Role Model, But Did She Have To Be So Robotic?

8/3/2017 By: Amanda Brecken As a child, I idolized Munch’s Make Believe Band. My parents would take me to Chuck E. Cheese and buy me game tokens, but I would be so infatuated with the musical stylings of the band that I wouldn’t want to play games. Sometimes I’d just throw my tokens at the band’s feet and shout song requests. As a woman, I now look back and realize that Helen Henny was my first strong female role model and a positive guiding force in my life. That being said, did she have to be portrayed so robotically? There… … Keep Reading

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