Are Pacifiers Leading Infants Down a Dangerous Path?

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By: Maximilian Stolte

11/17/2016

Pacifiers provide a sense of comfort for infants and appeal to their instinct to suck, but what are the ramifications? Many parents use them to sooth their crying babies and help them go to sleep, but what mothers are finding is that they are causing more and more babies to fall into a dangerous lifestyle: rave culture. This has led to what some are calling the infant ecstasy epidemic of 2016.

Amy Osbourne, mother of two from Austin, Texas, is creating a movement of mothers against pacifiers in order to quell this outbreak of infantile MDMA abuse. “It started with the pacifier, then I noticed something wasn’t right with my little Damon. He always seemed to be very happy and react in positive ways when I played his Baby Mozart CDs. My 4 year old, Ally, was always telling me how much she loved me and giving me hugs and back rubs. I knew something wasn’t right.”

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Amy and other mothers are concerned that their children will become sexually active, contracting sexual transmitted diseases, or overdose on dangerous club drugs. Besides boycotting the binky, Amy has some helpful advice for new parents and warning signs that your baby may be at risk.

“When you’re fast asleep and you THINK your baby is sleeping, there’s always the fear that they have snuck off to a rave. If they wake you up in the middle of the night crying there is a good chance they are ‘coming down’ from an ecstasy high and their serotonin levels are low. Look out for codewords from toddlers like ‘fun dip’ (a powdered form of ecstasy called molly) and if your baby is attracted to toys that light up and play music keep a close eye on them,” warns Osbourne. “I’ve heard from some mothers that different colored pacifiers indicate which sexual activities infants and toddlers are willing to engage in with each other.”

Skeptics say that Osbourne and her coalition of mothers are overreacting and that their paranoia is getting the best of them, but Amy and others believe education is the only way to help these tiny humans, so share this with a new mother that you care about. Don’t let your children grow up to be this…
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